So this is the New Year....

I don't usually do new years resolutions or things like that because maybe I'm afraid of failing?? But this year feels like a year to commit!! One of the huge transitions my husband has been dwelling on is buying land to build a farm!!! A FARM!! Me?? farm life?? NEVER in a million years did I think I'd ever be excited about such a thing, and up until recently I had been kinda letting it go through one ear and out the other. And y'all know Daniel, always steaming over a new idea or designing something or another, so I wasn't convinced it would go anywhere any time soon. HOWEVER, the way things are going in our government and the way they are spending money...well, let us just say we have to start thinking about how we are going to provide for ourselves without relying on the American dollar AND the government (yes! I said it!). I have been convinced of this, won over to the side of logic, simple economics, cause and effect, etc. Sooo now that I have had time to dwell on it and see other people living happily on organic foods THEY produced (so cool right?!), I am SUPER excited about the idea. It has taken me MONTHS to come around...mainly because I like the stability of having that Army paycheck; I like being able to spontaneously buy something I want when I see it and not having to budget for it (which is bad practice anyways!!!); and I like having tons of food in the fridge and cupboard, because that means I have OPTIONS, lol. (sounds horrible when I write that out...I'm a spoiled Army wife!) If you know me at all, you know that the phrase, "hmmm, I feel like..." comes out of my mouth a lot (just ask my hubs). My stomach kinda drives me, which is AWFUL because (a) my love for living for Jesus should be the reason I'm able to get up every morning and face the day, not the eggs on toasted Ezekiel bread and decaf hazelnut coffee that I love so much...and (b) it's so mind-consuming (did I make that word up?)! I'd like to free up some RAM for other, more healthy thoughts, like thinking about whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy (Phil 4:8). Paul says in Phillipians 3:18-19, "For, as I have often told you before and now say again even with tears, many live as enemies of the cross of Christ. Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things." I do NOT want this to be true of me!! I don't want to be living as an enemy of the cross of Christ. When Jesus carried that cross to His death, He was LAYING DOWN his own fleshly desires for the will of His father, who loved us so deeply that He sent Jesus to make a way for our sins to no longer be the dividing line between us and Him. WE CAN NOW be FRIENDS of God, and His Spirit can dwell in us because of Jesus (if we choose to believe in Him and turn from OUR ways and turn towards letting Jesus call the shots in our life versus us calling the shots). I know I'm not an enemy of God, but I know I act like it when I place earthly things in priority over the things Christ is calling me to pursue. Ok...stepping down off that little soap box now..but can I get an amen??!!


Going back to my resolutions....I'd also like to have room in my mind to focus my thoughts on how to be a better wife...on being that Proverbs 31 woman! My accountability partner and I have been memorizing Prov 31:10-31 for about a month now (I've only mastered verses 10-15ish) and I almost chickened out after Christmas because I was getting lazy and it became such a looong feat in my mind to conquer, and I thought, "wellll, I don't need to memorize the rest...I can just read it!" But no. NO NO NO. I am going to finish memorizing it because I want it to become a part of me. I want it to take up a little bit of space in my brain so that maybe one day when I'm not being a wife who "works with WILLING hands" (vs 13) the Holy Spirit can bring up that verse as a way to break down my pride (cause OH BOY, I've got some pride y'all), create a little repentance in my heart, and guide me back towards holiness. I'm so thankful Jesus makes His dwelling inside of us, because otherwise I would be so lost in my own selfishness I wouldn't know how to get back!!! Now, those of you who do not know my husband very well...He is quiet the subtle man. I mean, me...my emotions, thoughts, feelings are written all over my face. If I like something, you'll know it...if I don't like something...well, you'll know that too ;) My husband on the other hand... His way of expressing he likes something is by literally saying the words, "I like that". There's no further elaboration that comes from him, unlike if I like something, I'd go on and on about how awesome it would be to have x or be able to experience y. I wish I could give you an exact for-instance moment SO bad, just so I could explain HOW HARD it is to pick up on....but that's only because we are so opposite in the way we communicate, in general! Anyways, I resolve to being intentional about LISTENING for HIS cues. Remembering his likes, dislikes, and preferences and doing things accordingly sometimes to show him that I love him, instead of just doing things the ways that are easiest for or preferable to me.
{For example, he likes it when the laundry is put away in the basket and not on the bathroom floor in the place that I took them off...and he like a clean, organized bedroom. Well, we are far far away from a clean and organized bedroom...but I can make it a priority to work on it little by little every day and try to get it there over time, because that's something that makes him happy. My problem is, I feel like I have so much STUFF rattling around in my brain that I can't remember all of the things he likes and dislikes, (a) because he barely says it at all (but he's getting better about this for real, he's workin on it! We all have our things...I'm not pickin on him...too much, HA) or (b) he's really subtle about it that I just don't pick up on it (i'm a little too upfront with my feelings). SOOO my solution is to write down everything I can think of in columns labeled "likes", "dislikes" and "possible gift ideas" so that I will have an easy "go to" place when I need it! I hate when a birthday or something sneaks up on me and the week of I'm like, oh crap, what am I going to get him?? This would also be good to do with other close family members and friends, that way I'm never caught in a bind.}
Going back to food...(hehe)

Danny and I have always struggled with eating dessert like, every night..and we go through spurts where we "only" eat it every other night or three times a week. And we tried the Paleo thing but hubs hates that lifestyle because he read that if you don't stay 100% true to it it defeats the nutritional benefits you were trying to accomplish to begin with, and, well he doesn't want to never have "junk food" again just to maintain the benefits of the "lifestyle". I, on the other hand, could live with just having a cheat day once a week, even if that meant I was defeating the whole purpose of going Paleo in the first place. Sigh. This is marriage. Gotta compromise and you gotta be a team...SOOO...we are eating up all of our gross processed foods (we've been eating them for 27 years thus far, so another few months won't kill us) and moving towards eating WHOLE FOODS...ie, real food. This will also help with the transition to moving to the homesteading/farm life and becoming self-sufficient. So...this is good and I'm excited. So, to tag on another resolution....I want to start practicing planting food! I wanna do tomatoes, sweet potatoes, spinach, kale, herbs, cucumbers and onions, for starters ;) Hubby found this neat and inexpensive way to grow things in "grow bags", and we like this idea because it's portable!


Here's an example


and also here's a tutorial that this guys created on how to make the grow bags yourself (DIY grow bags).


It's a perfect project that I think Liam would enjoy helping me with :) He's still a little too young to understand the whole growing process...but still, it will be fun! This video also helped get me excited about how much you could really do with just a little motivation and perseverance. This guy is doing a great job and he def inspired me!  Take a peak:

To sum up my resolutions so far and corresponding verses:

Proverbs 31, "An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her,and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
1. Make it a priority to be a better wife to Daniel, doing HIM good (including KNOWING him and putting HIM before ME)
2. Practice my homesteading skills (making whole foods and planting a garden!)

1 Corinthians 6:19-20, "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body." Taking this to heart...
3. Quit letting my stomach/appetite drive me.

And to add a few more...

Proverbs 31:17, "She dresses herself[b] with strength and makes her arms strong..."
4. I need to continue my EXERCISE!!! and I choose crossfit, cause I love love love it--the motivation I get from the people there and from my coach, and I love how fast I can see results--muscles are already forming in 4 months yo! ...BOO-YOOWW! But gotta keep up my crossfit this year!

Ecclesiastes 8:15, "So I recommend having fun, because there is nothing better for people to do in this world than to eat, drink, and enjoy life. That way they will experience some happiness along with all the hard work God gives them." (NLT)
5. Do something that makes me excited/happy at least once per month on the cheap cheap...(sewing, pinterest DIYs, SUMTHIN!)


Personally, I want to gain a more eternal perspective rather than being fueled by instant gratification and worldly possessions. I want to experience Jesus' peace and presence in a REAL way every day this year! That is my hope. All of these resolutions sound amazing and great, but they are going to be unattainable without the my constant reliance on Christ in my life. Earlier this week in my quiet time (QT) God reminded me that he is the CONSTANT Companion in my life...and I thought about what constant meant (never ending, never quitting, always, forever, etc)...and in those quiet moments I took to just BE, He gave me a vision that this year is going to hold some trials and chaos will be going on around me, but to RECEIVE His presence and His peace. I felt in my Spirit a calmness as He made me feel the truth behind the words that God is our fortress, our strong tower (Ps 61:3). He said to me, I got you Nicole...you are safe and protected from the chaos that every day holds...I felt Him tell me that He's got me protected from the upcoming troubles in 2014...protected beneath the cover of His PRESENCE (Ps 31:20).

So... 6. I want to REST in and be CONSUMED by God's presence and peace this year.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

I pray you find peace and experience God's presence as well this year.

I challenge you to write down your New Years Resolutions and tell a friend what they are so they can hold you accountable! Commit...don't be afraid. You can do just about anything to put your mind to, and, spiritually speaking, you can do anything with Christ who IS your strength (Phil 4:13)!

PS, Don't expect a big ol long post like this too often. I've quickly realized how much time a blog takes!!! But I'm definitely enjoying writing my thoughts and plans out and I'll hopefully be writing more as the Spirit works in my life. :) Thank you guys so much for reading!!!

Much love,
Nik